The Courage to Love

Although love is exploited and idolized in our culture, many still fear it. They want it, but they do everything to sabotage love from ever lighting upon their doorstep. Some use their intellect as a way to guard their hearts from anything so volatile and unpredictable as love. Others use their past wounds as justification for battening down the hatches.

Just before I met my husband, I had come to the conclusion that I was going to love anyway. I could have joined the club of Bitter Women Who Have Been Dogged Like a Flea Bitten Mutt, but I realized life is too short. I'm one of those types who love to love. Not everyone was open to someone like me, but you know what? Tough. I loved 'em, anyway. This meant opening my heart at least an inch in order to allow love to flow through.

I eventually learned to practice wisdom. I didn't want to love the psychopath, thinking my "all-is-right-with-the-world" attitude would change him. I determined to love people in general and let the chips fall where they may. I remember feeling very vibrant during that time. It was as though I had plugged into a huge amplifier and the energy coursed through my being, demanding to be deposited somewhere and preferably not in a quiet zone. I thought of the biblical verse, "Love never fails."

Why does love never fail? What is it about this particular emotion that sends poets rushing for a pen and ordinary people grinning like idiots, even in the midst of a downpour?

I believe it is the primary language of our soul. This is how we are to speak to one another. This is the life we were created to live.

When we love, so many good things happen that you'd think everyone would rush to join the fun. But almost the opposite is true. Many at one point in their life, rushed into love but ended up running into a wall. Maybe the wall was put in place by their parents, an old girlfriend, boyfriend, or friend-friend. Whatever happened, they decided that maybe rushing wasn't such a good idea after all and crawled away to a nice comfy cave.

I talk about my husband frequently because I am in awe of him. He would consider himself an average guy but to me, he's my hero. He is the one man who rushed headlong into loving me. He immersed me in his heart to a degree I had never known before. Of course he deserved my love until death do us part. It was as though he ran toward a cliff and jumped in wild abandon. He wasn't guaranteed my devotion by doing what he did. He did it simply because he loved fully, fiercely, and fearlessly. How could I not love such a man?

Everyone has a different timetable in arriving at such a willing state. If you find yourself withdrawing into the darkest recesses of your cave, I would like to challenge you to take a walk. You don't have to declare your undying love to the first stranger you meet.

Simply smile. A teeny, tiny opening is better than none at all. Small risks of interaction will lead to the big risk you will eventually take to find love. For loving is a risk but it is the most fabulous risk you can take. A risk we were all born to take. May you have the courage to love today.

Mary Rose Maguire, Dating Revolutionist! is a relationship coach, professional speaker, and freelance writer for single women over forty. She has conducted workshops on dating over forty, Internet dating, and communication skills for singles. Her unique Dynamic Dating Design approach has helped single women over forty create more opportunities to meet men while enjoying life. She has appeared as a guest on HealthyNet Radio Show, the "By For and About Women Radio Show", WTVN's “The Silver Lining” Show in Columbus, Ohio, and on Columbus FOX 28 Early Morning News Show. Mary Rose Maguire is also the author of the 5 Ways a Single Woman Over 40 Can Find Love eBook, based on her signature workshop. For speaking engagements or media interviews, please contact her at Dating Revolutionist [http://www.datingrevolutionist.com].