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2012年10月19日 星期五

Courting Versus Dating - What Makes Them Different


Is dating similar to courting? What difference does it make? I've been dating someone; does that mean I'm also courting? These are some questions that can confuse a lot of people. Nowadays, relationships are different compared to the past. Romeo didn't send any emails or texts to Juliet. In the past, going out on a date requires a chaperone.

In the present times, people have coined courting and dating similar. They think that the end results of both actions are the same. Moreover, people think that you would still end up in a relationship with a person. Honestly speaking, they are completely different. Here are the reasons as to why courting and dating are different.

Courting versus Dating Reason # 1: Courting Has A Biblical Basis, Dating Has None

Courting can be found in the bible in terms of principle and example. Proverbs 18:22 says that, "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord". It clearly implies that seeking and pursuing someone comes with a purpose. That is why; in the Christian church, they advise courting before marriage. The dating principle is not written in the bible. That is because they find dating as a preceding act of sexual impurity.

Courting versus Dating Reason # 2 Both Have Different Histories

Courting is a form of the past. In medieval times, you have to court someone and not take her out on a date. A great example of which would be the story of Romeo and Juliet. It greatly depicts as to what a relationship was in the past. On the other hand, dating is relatively new. It is something of the modern age.

Courting versus Dating Reason # 3 Both are Different In Definition

By definition, courting is the relationship leading to marriage based on a biblical model. It is more serious and it involves various stages. Moreover, it involves the parents of the woman you are courting. You need to ask their permission. Also, courting by definition may also be coined as pursuing. Dating, on the other hand, means you are going out with someone. You are going out with someone but that doesn't mean both of you are a couple.

Courting versus Dating Reason # 4 Each Have Different Motives

Some men would rather remain conventional. He would rather go court and pursue a woman. According to some men, it is one great way of knowing the person deeply. You get to know both the good and the bad traits. Also, the courtship leads to marriage. On the other hand, dating is a whole different thing. It involves a person wanting someone for companionship. It is when two persons go out and know each other superficially.

There are people that frown at the thought of dating. According to some Christian men, it is a way of temptation to sexual impurity. They consider it as an unstable form of relationship. Moreover, conventional men think that dating doesn't make a man out of them. They would rather be courting someone to show to a girl that they are indeed gentlemen.




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This article is contributed by Tina Jones from the Unforgettable Woman Publishing Team. She works together with founder Alexandra Fox and writes dating/relationship articles for women. You can find more about Unforgettable Woman Publishing by visiting their website.




2012年8月9日 星期四

Attraction Versus Love - Can You Turn Dating Drama Into Emotional Intimacy With 3 Love Tips?


Going out with hot dates who offer big dramas with little contentment is a form of directionless, dead-end dating. Would you like to try a new dating direction that leads you to a loving relationship? Learn how to turn dating drama into emotional intimacy as a prelude to a loving relationship with 3 simple Love Tips:

1. See Attraction With New Eyes

Big attraction comes with big love lessons attached like a bow. Look for the love lesson in the dating dramas that you consistently attract. And ask your self an important question:

Does your drama date have any personality traits of your early caregivers?

If their drama seems familiar, you may have been attracted to your drama date in order to return to the scene of your original childhood hurt and frustration.

According to dating theory formed by renowned psychologist, Harville Hendrix Ph.d, this type of romantic attraction stems from our search for "imago" -- a Latin word meaning, image. Your imago is composed of pictures of people who influenced your life most strongly in your early years. When you face your childhood challenges as an adult with a person who triggers unhealed feelings and patterns, you give yourself an opportunity to heal old wounds.

I often tell my online community that when you learn this love lesson and take action on its healing insights, the attraction has fulfilled its purpose. Now you don't have to keep repeating the same lesson by attracting the same type of drama date into your life, unless you want to.

2. See Dating As A Path To Personal Growth

You are what you are aware of. Like attracts like. This means every quality or quirk that you notice in a date reflects parts of you that can be savored or strengthened.

If you notice a personality quirk that you don't like, you can feel thankful that your date revealed where your personality or behavior could use a tune up.

With this outlook, each date may help you grow as a person -- to strengthen your strengths so your weaknesses lose power, deepen your intelligence and open your heart to genuine love.

3. See With Your Heart As You Choose Your Best Love Match

Beware of superficial wrapping, because the genuine gift lies within.

What inner gifts are an essential foundation for a loving relationship?

- A healthy, adult personality

- Freedom to trust

- Ability to know and be known, to give and receive love

- Healthy self love, self esteem, self knowledge

- A kind heart, freely sharing of acts of kindness

- Personal autonomy and living within means

- Reaching for dreams with solid action each day

- A resilient optimism and passion for life

- An inner goodness that moves you to love

Once you see and share these inner gifts with a potential love match, you will experience a quiet drama of two adults moving closer to oneness based on shared vision and values, emotional intimacy, and enthusiasm for life and love. This emotional intimacy a prelude to a loving relationship.




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